Thx 4 Ur Consideration!: Part 2

Thx 4 Ur Consideration!: Part 2

In an age of fast-talking, high-tech communication, it’s still a sin to be casual when e-mailing an employer. Remember, it's an application, not a post on your Facebook wall!

This is part 2 of the article. To read part 1, click here.

Subject: graduate surveyor job (1)
From: (2)
Sent: 31 July 2013 14:42:31
Attachment: CV.doc (50.3 KB); cover_letter.doc (30.4 KB) (3) 

Hi Charlene.
I've heard that you're looking for graduate surveyors. Is that right? I've seen your ad and would like to apply. Here is my CV and cover letter. Please look at them and let me know if I'm what you want. (5)

James Wee (6)

4. "Hi", "Hello", or "Dear"?

"Hi" is a bit too casual for your first contact with an employer. "Dear Charlene Wong" is probably your safest bet.

If the recruiter replies with a "Hi" and your first name, then take their lead and do likewise in all your subsequent correspondence. Nonetheless, always be sure to maintain a professional tone.

5. Does your e-mail have a respectful, considered tone?

It’s all too easy for the tone of an e-mail to slacken off and become casual and thoughtless. How do you think the following would come across to an employer?

"I’ve heard that you’re looking for graduate surveyors. Is that right?

An employer would think: "This candidate sounds as if they apply on hearsay. Is that really the standard of accuracy we want for a land surveyor in our company?"

It’s also a bit muddled, as the candidate's message goes on to say that he's "seen an ad". Which ad and where? What's more, "Is that right?" sounds a bit confrontational.

"Well, of course it’s right!" a recruiter might think. "I booked the ad!"

On the other hand, you have:

"Here is my CV and cover letter. Please look at them and let me know if I'm what you want."

This candidate might think they’re creating the right impression, but everything points to someone who’s just fired off this e-mail in a hurry.

"What I 'want'," a recruiter might think. "Is for this James Wee to actually read my ad and give me an idea of why he thinks he might be suitable for this job!"

By contrast, here's a better way to phrase this e-mail.

"I saw your corporate pamphlet for graduate surveyors at Malaysia University career services and am interested in applying. I have attached my CV and a covering letter for your consideration.

Please let me know if you require any additional information. You can reach me via this e-mail address, or on my mobile at 011 123 4567. I look forward to meeting you in person to further discuss what I can offer to your company." 

6. Signing off

Close your e-mail as you would a "proper" covering letter. You should make the effort to get a contact name for your application and address that person directly – so sign off with "Yours sincerely" and use your full name.

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